A Day in the Life of a Little Mister

Standing just shy of 3 ½ feet, I rule this stage. Mom just said to wave and be cute.

“Ha, like that’s a problem for me.”

With my lady by my side, we stand proud at the edge of the stage, the announcer says my favorite show is Sponge Bob and that I love Little Caesars pizza. Well, any pizza really!

“Hey mom, why are you pinching your cheeks like that?”

My friends really wanted to be here to cheer me on. Mom said maybe later we can have a sleepover and watch Ratatouille. But back to now, they are calling my name.

Although I haven’t quite mastered the art of tying my shoes, I do know how to flash my baby-teeth grin.

“Did you notice my two new gaps? The tooth fairy came last week, just in time for the Fair!”

We make our way off the stage and through the clouds of “cough, cough…” hairspray. Thank goodness I don’t have to do all that! Gross! The girls with their hair squeezed tightly around sponge curlers squeal and squirm while gobs of lip gloss are shellacked on their puckered lips.

While she gets all adorable, I gotta check my notes. Dad made me put this paper in my pocket so I won’t forget what to do. It says…

CHECKLIST

Get dressed at 11:40 a.m. (remember to zip pants)

Practice run-throughs at noon

Last-minute outfit changes at 12:10 p.m.

Group interviews with the judges (be polite and don’t pick nose!)

Sit and wait

WIN at 7:30 p.m.!

In the meantime, Mom, Dad, Sis and I hit up the Kidz Biz area and stroll outdoors, only to find funnel cakes the size of the Little Miss’ crown. I scarf down a corn dog and mom shrieks.

“Be careful not to spill any ketchup on your sash!”

I eye the Thrillway and wonder if my crown will stay in place as I twirl and dip on the Kiddie Rides.

I’m not sure exactly how this blue and white sash is supposed to fit, but people keep staring at me because of it as I walk through the exhibits. They point, ooh and aah as they marvel at my perfect blonde hair. Then they ask what county I represent and if I’m ready to win tonight.

“Of course I’m ready to win! I’m a Little Mister!”

Tonight is the night, when I’ll strut my stuff in front of a big crowd and they’ll cheer us on with whoops and hollers. I’ll take my Little Miss’ hand and we’ll saunter across the stage in our pressed shirts and dresses.

A day at the Fair could end perfectly if we win the title of Little Miss and Mister. But I guess we’ll just have to wait and see at the Little Miss and Mister Kentucky County Fairs Pageant at 7:30 p.m. in South Wing B.

Hopefully lots of people come out to watch me!